26 REDS & A BOTTLE OF WINE
Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion
Does anyone else have anything constructive to say about this trailer for Sofia Coppola’s new film? I love that she is the most boring person in the world. It almost makes her hot, almost. I just can’t get past her shitty self important writing. Plus I hated Lost in Translation.
Anyway, I would have loved to have been at the meeting where this got green lighted.
Movie Producer: “We're gonna make a period piece about Maria Antoinette.”
Movie Executive : “Okay…”
Movie Producer: “And we’ve cast Kirsten Dunst and a bust of French faggots.”
Movie Executive : “I see…”
Movie Producer: “And we’re gonna use clever new wave music certain to not stand the
test of the next three minutes.”
Movie Executive : (scratching his chin and leaning back) “hmmmmm….”
Movie Producer: “Did I mention it’ll cost 60 million dollars?”
Movie Executive : (leaping to his feet) “Sold!!! You can pick up the check in the
morning!”
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I think the casting of Dunst was brilliant. Her fucked-up snaggle teeth perfectly reflects the dental fashion of the period.
If you told me before I watched the trailer that it was one of those "mashed-up" parody trailers going around the web right now, I would have totally believed it. And laughed. A lot.
Preface
Sofia: Hi. Remember that time when I directed Lost In Translation? Remember when I cleaned up at various award ceremonies because people confused boring with charmingly offbeat & quirky?
Movie Producer: Yes! I loved that movie! Who goes around wearing wigs all day?!! That's so offbeat & charming!
Sofia: You know who does that? Marie Antoinette.
Movie Producer: Buh?
Sofia: Marie Antoinette. Only she's not really that interesting of a person. Which is perfect because I know uninteresting!
Movie Producer: So you want to do a period piece? [wary] That sounds normal. What about the quirk?
Sofia: The quirk is this period piece will be an esoteric commentary on other period pieces.
Movie Producer: I'm bored.
Sofia: That's only because you can't hear the Romeo + Juliet-type soundtrack I plan to use. Once the audience hears songs that could easily be featured on The O.C. or Grey's Anatomy, they will instinctively know they are supposed to think this movie is cool.
Movie Producer: You are so refreshing!
Oh. My . God I caaaaaan't wait to see it. i salivated watching the trailer. really. can we still be friends?